Cute, Like a Rampaging Hippogriff
by Akira Muratake
Summary: Short ficlet I wrote on request from one of the fans on a HP page I admin. Fremione. Fred/Hermione . When a prank goes wrong, retreating is usually the most reasonable ending. Fred Weasley, though, has an odd way of going about it.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Hey guys! I know I haven't updated much in a while; I'm very busy with my current writing projects that I actually get paid for. It is very exhausting. I hopefully will be able to revise the Antediluvian Fairytale soon yet again, and stick up a second chapter.

In any case, this is a rather long-ish headcanon I wrote on a HP page I admin on FB. If you would like to visit us and request a headcanon of your own, head on over to facebook ExcuseMeIHaveToGoAndVomit  
And, YES, I DO PERSONALISED HEAD CANONS ALSO!

"Fred Weasley, you have better not be serious." Hermione's voice was low and even, but everyone who had ever seen her mad, knew that this was the voice the fifth year used when she was about to go on a rampage.  
"Woah, Hermione, calm down..." Fred pleaded, holding his hands up. Behind him, George was slowly backing away, preparing to flee should it become necessary.  
"Calm down?" Hermione's eyes flashed, her nostrils flared. Fred noticed it might not have been a wise thing to say to her. "You put plastic cockroaches in my BED!"  
"You can come sleep in mine if those bother you." Fred offered. Hermione huffed and slapped his head. "OW! I was just kidding!"  
"And now... Now, you are telling me you put a giant plastic spider in Ron and Harry's room and bewitched it to MOVE?" she hissed. A scream came from the direction of the aforementioned room. All involved turned to see Ron sprinting down the hallway, screaming in terror.  
"SPIDER! AND IT'S HUGE! HELP!" he screamed.  
"Go get mum!" George called.  
"Good idea!" Ron screamed back, and thundered down the stairs to the kitchen.  
Hermione spun back around, glaring angrily at the twins. Fred and George were having difficulty containing their snickering.  
"You think this is funny, do you?" Hermione asked. "It's your fault he's afraid of spiders in the first place!"  
Fred continued snickering as George continued backing away. Hermione didn't quite notice, as she was busy glaring at Fred.  
"Hey, relax... it's totally funny, if you think about it." Fred replied casually.  
"IF YOU THINK ABOUT IT!" Hermione shouted. She tried to hit Fred again; however, he gently caught her hand, and instead pressed a sneaky kiss to her lips, shocking her into stillness. Behind him, he could sense George sprinting off to their room.  
"Talk to you later, Hermione." Fred said, and, releasing her, courageously ran away, following his brother. Hermione remained rooted to the spot, a look of confusion on her face.

"Man, you've got it bad for Granger..." George said, snickering, as the two safely ensconced themselves in their room.  
"I can't help it. She's too cute when she's mad." Fred replied.  
"Yeah... cute... like a rampaging hippogriff is cute, alright."


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: I wrote this on a HP page I admin on FB as a head canon. If you would like to visit us and request a headcanon of your own, head on over to **Face book, Excuse Me I Have To Go And Vomit**  
And, YES, I DO PERSONALIZED HEAD CANONS ALSO!

* * *

As soon as Fred Weasley set foot in his dorm, he felt an utter sense of something being amiss. However, he tried to shake it off; after all, who would dare to prank the greatest pranksters to have wandered the halls since the Marauders themselves? Indeed, during the summer, the remaining two Marauders had given Fred and George their official Marauder Badges, thereby vesting in them the inalienable authority to cause mischief and mayhem... not that anyone really knew what this meant, aside from the Golden Trio, but still, it was the principle of it.

Thus, Fred was not too worried as he got ready to jump into bed. He changed into his pajamas, and pulled back the curtain on his bed when...

"" came a scream from the Seventh Year boys' dormitories. George and Lee ran up the stairs from the common room and burst into the room in question.  
Fred was being attacked by a flock of really angry birds, which divebombed and pecked at him continuously. He was shielding his eyes and trying to avoid being pecked to death.  
Lee started laughing first, followed by George.  
"Shut it, you bloody tossers, and help me!" Fred shouted. George waved a wand to try and dispel the flock; however, this only led to the birds doubling in number and ferocity.

It took a long time, and a lot of stunners, but finally the birds were rounded up and tossed out the window, and the three mischief-makers collapsed onto a bed. Feathers, bird poo, and random torn-up particles were scattered everywhere; it was a scene of much carnage.  
"So, who do you think was behind this?" Fred asked at last.  
George gave his twin one of his Looks. "Hm, considering the fact that you flirted with Angelina in the Great Hall in sight of Hermione, and you kissed her in the summer?"  
Lee looked surprised. "Hold up. He kissed Granger last summer, and now he was flirting with Angie?" he shook his head. "Freddie, Freddie, my man, it sometimes surprises me how little self-preservation instincts you have."  
"Yeah... it's like asking for death." George seconded, frowning.  
"You think it was Hermione?" Fred asked hopefully.  
"You like her, don't you..." Lee muttered, scourgifying his pillow.  
"Man... One does not simply mess with Hermione Granger and live. It is folly." George told his brother sternly.

Suddenly, there was a loud chirping at the door of the room, and small yellow objects began to pelt the trio again.  
"OH GOD THEY'RE BAAAACK HEEEEEEELP"

Somewhere in the common room, Hermione Granger smiled a satisfied grin as she fingered her Marauder badge, inconspicuously pinned to her bookbag. Revenge, accomplished.


End file.
